So As Not to Lose Him
by sibellaawkward
Summary: If friendship was the only thing he could give her, she'll take it gratefully so as not to lose him.
Éponine was not having a good day. She's only made 3 francs and it feels like she had robbed every person out on the streets. His father had made them a deal- a deal she had not agreed to- meet half the quota and you eat dinner. Meet the quota and you eat dinner and sleep in a make shift bed. If you don't meet half, you'll sleep and starve outside with a bonus of extra beatings from Thenardier.

It wasn't helping that all Marius could talk about is about that girl Courgette, as Grantaire calls her. All she could do is to try not to scoff or grunt or roll her eyes.

"'Ponine!" Marius had called her. She turned to her best friend, smiling half-assed.

"Monsieur?" She asked, holding the coins in her pocket, hoping it wouldn't fall out of her coat.

"Have you seen Cosette today?" He asked. She shook her head. Her eyebrows shot up. "Is there a problem, 'Ponine? You seem awfully quiet."

"The sun is setting and I still have not met my quota. I wouldn't be able to eat again if he knew." She answered, looking down as if she was confessing her sin to a judge in the court.

"I'd let you sleep in my flat but I would be over at Cosette's later this evening and wouldn't be home early." He told her. She knew that. Marius always reassures her that she'd be taken under his wing.

"Oh." She said. "I better get going then, Monsieur. Have fun at Cosette's." She turned around, hoping Marius could see her hurting, but he shrugged it off. He said a goodbye and went off.

These kind of nights, she uses the francs she stole to buy her bread and a cup of tea. She then will make her way to an old alley way where no one could see her. The francs that were not used will be used tomorrow in case the quota has not been met. If it is, then she'll keep the money to herself and save up for a new dress or for her siblings 'Zelma and Gavroche. Éponine was no doubt independent. She didn't need a man to take care of her or to pay for her needs. She can fight back for herself, all she needed was time. When the right time comes, she'll leave this place. It doesn't matter when or how, but she will.

Lying on the stone cold ground, her thoughts lingered to her best friend, Marius. She was no stranger to the fact that she has feelings for him. She was furious that someone has replaced her from his life. Cosette, the princess. Cosette, the beautiful girl. Cosette, the angel. She could write a poem about Cosette based on all of the words love sick Marius has mentioned to her.

How he could neglect her that easily, she couldn't understand. But the thing she couldn't fathom the most was how she was such a girl around Marius. She was Éponine Thenardier, and she needed no man.

Morning came the next day and she snuck to the make shift bathroom at the back of the inn. She scrubbed all the dirt and grime off and tried to untangle her hair from the knots. As soon as she was finished, she made her way back to Paris to do her job: Pick-pocket the bourgeois.

"'Ponine!" Marius called. The sight of him just makes her angry, and so she ran away. These encounters have happened more than the times Éponine prayed that she would bump into him. There are times when they would lock eyes with each other amidst the crowd. He would give her a polite smile and she would roll her eyes and move on. 'If he really cared, he would've talked to me already. He knows where to find me.' Éponine would tell herself and would carry on pick-pocketing after. Éponine never thought she's last a week and a half with no Marius around her.

* * *

She was staring at the bridge over looking Seine. She only made 2 and a half francs that night. She would sleep outside. No use of going home if they'll throw her out not long after.

"A penny for your thoughts?" A familiar voice stood behind her. It wasn't only familiar. It was the voice of the man who has kept her sane and insane at the same time. She turned around to face Marius. "I've missed you, 'Ponine."

If it were in different circumstances, she would have kissed Marius on the spot. There on the bridge. Under the moonlight. It was like they were in a romantic scene. Éponine stood still and gave him a polite smile and turned back to face the rippling waters, reflecting the moonlight.

"What happened, 'Ponine? You suddenly stopped talking to me." He started, not sure how to confront her. No matter how he spoke to her, Éponine is undeniably pissed at him. Why, he did not know.

"So now, I'm the one not talking?" Éponine retorted. He didn't stop talking to her, no. But he did, when he started talking of Cosette. He stopped talking to her about his dreams, his passion, his studies. He stopped talking about his experiences. All he could talk to her was about Cosette, Cosette, love, Cosette, Cosette's Handkerchief and Cosette.

"I don't understand, 'Ponine." He mumbled, as if ashamed of himself for not knowing.

Éponine sighed. "As long as you're love sick and blind, I don't think you'll understand." They were silent for a moment. Cold wind pierced through Éponine's skin. Marius saw how she shivered. He was wearing a long sleeved shirt and a coat so he gave his coat to the lady beside him. Éponine refused but Marius insisted. "I should be heading home, Monsieur."

"At least let me walk you home, Éponine."

"I don't have a home tonight, Monsieur."

"Stay with me for tonight then, 'Ponine." She sighed. She knew Marius wouldn't let this pass and would just keep on insisting. So she nodded. The two walked in silence. Marius kept on glancing towards her direction, making sure she wouldn't run away like she always did for the past two weeks.

She was sitted in the kitchen, waiting for someone to talk.

"When was the last time you've eaten, 'Ponine?" Marius asked.

As if on cue, her stomach growled. "A long time, I think."

He put in front of her soup and bread along with the tea he made. "Thank you, Monsieur." She had finished her food and drink after a couple of minutes. Everytime Éponine is over, Marius would make her something to eat, and while she is eating he would read books in the fireplace. And then she would ask him questions, about everything. She would do that everytime, he was surprised when she didn't.

Marius turned around to see his Éponine sprawled upon the table, fast asleep. He was uncomfortable with her position so he carried her to his bedroom and let her sleep. He would have gotten back to the sofa and read some more, but instead, he stared at Éponine sleeping. She was peaceful. In sleep, her high bricked walls abandon her. In sleep, she doesn't think of how she will eat or where she will spend the night. In sleep, she becomes this little girl instead of the woman she was forced to be.

The sun peaked through the windows of Marius' bedroom. She was startled by the sunlight trying to wake her from her deep slumber. It has been a long time since she last slept soundly. She remembered how Marius saved her from a night of starvation and a sleep on Paris' ice cold ground.

'M. Marius, thank you for last night. I don't want to intrude much longer, I still have work to do. -É' She wrote on a piece of paper and left it on the kitchen table where she was sure he would see it. Her handwriting was bad and difficult to understand, but tolerable. She's only learned to write with Marius' help. Her interest in Marius' books made her able to read.

* * *

Ever since that night, Éponine has tried not to snob her best friend. She was still a bit distant but tries to tell him everything he wants to hear. He was still talking about his darling Cosette. All the words coming out from Marius' mouth was all related to her. Éponine hated it when he does that. She would give him a polite smile and tell him she has to do something and slips out of Paris so as not to hear the words he'll never say about her.

Marius went up to her while resting on an alleyway. "You still haven't told me why you shut me out two weeks ago." He was eager to find out what was bothering her. Marius knows he could help her if ever she has problems. He's made it clear to her that he'll always be there for her.

She sighed, "Colette."

"What? It's Cosette."

"Whatever."

She was about to stand up when Marius pulled her back to where they were sitting. "What about her?"

She was about to say a retort but stopped herself. "She's all you talk about. You've started rejecting me and creating alibis so you could go on dates with her. I mean that's okay, who cares about the bitter, petty and useless best friend anyway?"

Marius breathed in her words. "Are you jealous?" Éponine stared at him as if it wasn't obvious enough. "I'm sorry 'Ponine." He held her hand. "If it means anything to you, then I'll refrain myself from talking about her." She wasn't sure how he was going to do that. But Éponine smiled. A genuine smile, not the polite and fake smiles she has given him for the past weeks.

He hugged her. All the world shattered around them. It was only Éponine and Marius. Her and Him. She's dirty and full of grime but it didn't stop him. Atleast he got his best friend back, and she got her Marius back. She hugged him back and cherished the moment.

 _ **If friendship was the only thing he could give her, she'll take it gratefully so as not to lose him.**_


End file.
